Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Power Of No - To Destroy Or To Inspire?

I've heard that word, and fancy variations of it, too many times this month. Too many dreams were crushed with that simple two-letter word. It's like a door slamming in your face, a door that will never open again; at least not in the foreseeable future, which, at this point, is all you care about.

Hope is a funny thing. It lets your dreams soar so high that you forget to keep your feet on the ground. It doesn't help that they feed you all this 'power of the mind' garbage either. What is it they called it? Oh, right. The Secret. Visualize, dream, and see it materialize before you. Right before Reality rudely wakes you up.

I give myself one day after every failure. I use this one day to wallow in absolute self pity, beat myself up and mourn the loss of something I wanted so dearly. I take one day to get it out of my system. And then it's time to get back on the horse, because there are worse things in life than not getting into the university of your choice or securing that dream job.

The new season of American Idol recently started, and this month they went through episodes of mass eliminations till they reached the top 24. You can see the power of no to completely destroy - for so many that 'no' was reason enough to wrap things up, say 'This is it. I'm done.' In one of the judges' many pep talks, Ellen says that she understands this 'no' because she heard it many times early in her career. But there she is, many years later, hosting her own television show and permanent judge on THE American Idol.

I'm fighting the urge to jump into a sappy speech about fighting against all odds, believing in yourself and moving forward. I think Mariah, Whitney and Celine have covered all of that. It's so much easier said than done because you keep going back and forth. I battle it out everyday. There are days where I'm resolute - I know what I want and I know what I have to do. And then there are other days, where I succumb and take whatever is thrown my way. At least I tried, right? I gave it my best shot.

I've read passionate texts about risk-taking and about emerging triumphant. But every time I would finish such a passage, I'd be left with one nagging thought. It's called a risk because more often than not, people fail. It's a tough truth to swallow, that perhaps you're not one in a million.

I want to end this piece on a positive note, as I try with most of my pieces. There's always hope in the end, because that's what keeps people moving forward. But this one’s tough.

There was this woman on American Idol who auditioned three years in a row and still didn't make it to the top 24. But she kept coming back. So I guess that's the real question. How many times are we willing to try and crash and burn and try all over again, before we give up altogether?