Can Women Have It All?

My experience has been, I haven’t been able to have it all at the same time. And I just try to remind young women that life is long... and we have to just define our own pathways.

The problem we get into is when we think we have to have it all in four years. If I’m going to be a partner in a law firm, for example, I have to do it in this time frame, or else I've lost. Or if I’m going to be a mother, I have to check off these boxes. We create these false goals for ourselves that are not based on what we need but what we think others think we should need, and we need to get off that pendulum.

I think what we fought for are choices, but if we don’t exercise the full breadth of those choices then I  think we’re selling ourselves out.

So my message to women is be open, give yourself a break, stop thinking that there is an answer to the question “can women have it all”, stop trying to answer it, just live your life and figure out what’s in your heart, what do you need and that’s going to change every year, and you've got to be okay with that.

- Michelle Obama, interview with iVillage, 22 Aug 2012